Mirror MIrror-Self-Esteem Relationships - RonaldMah

Ronald Mah, M.A., Ph.D.
Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist,
Consultant/Trainer/Author
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Mirror Mirror… Reflections of Self-Esteem in Relationships and Therapy
The request for communications oriented therapy often assumes a need for self-esteem focused therapy. Poor communication directly harms self-esteem and relationships as individuals poorly mirror each other. Comment, complaining, criticizing, contempt, defensiveness, disconnecting emotionally, and divorce are both stages of relationship devolution, but also concepts to assess communication dynamics, relationships, and direct therapy. Blocked or inappropriate expression or feelings, covert communication, open versus closed communication, congruence and connection, stances, games, and dysfunctional rules and rituals are examined for recognizing key relationship problems and therapeutic strategies. The development of self-esteem, relationship to socialization, the Four Principles of Self-Esteem, and mutually reciprocal affects between confrontation and conflict lead to two specific tools: the Four Honorings of Communication and the Working It Out Plan for therapy. In addition, the book presents the eight-step process to build the self-reflective foundations of self-esteem and the projective formulative seven-step process of self-esteem and the 90-Second-A-Day Self-Esteem Prescription Plan.




Mirror Mirror…
Reflections of Self-Esteem in Relationships and Therapy
by Ronald Mah

Table of Contents (links to chapters and sections)
Introduction: COMMUNICATIONS ORIENTED THERAPY
COMMENTING
COMPLAINING
CRITICIZING
CONTEMPT
DEFENSIVENESS
DISCONNECT EMOTIONALLY
DIVORCE
TERMINATION
BLOCKED OR INAPPROPRIATE EXPRESSION OF FEELINGS
COVERT COMMUNICATION
OPEN VS. CLOSED COMMUNICATION
CONGRUENCE AND CONNECTION
STANCES
GAMES
SIGNIFICANCE
MORAL VIRTURE
IDEAL SELF vs. REAL SELF
COUPLES AND MORAL VIRTUE
COMMUNAL POWER AND CONTROL
PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOR
I) KNOW ONESELF
II) BEING A MODEL OF SELF-LOVE
III) TAKE CARE OF ONESELF…FIRST!
IV) BE AVAILABLE
V) CONTRACT OF AVAILABILITY
VI) SEPARATE- THERE'S TWO, NOT ONE
VII) DISTINGUISH LOVE AND LIKE
VIII) UNDERSTAND THE OTHER
I) VALIDATE THE OTHER PERSON
II) HOLD RESPONSIBILE W/O SHAME, BLAME, & FAULT
SPLIT MILK LEAVES NO STAINS
III) NO ABUSE ALLOWED
IV) SELFCARE
V) CHALLENGE / EXPECTATIONS VS. PUSH/DEMANDS
VI) APPROPRIATE PRAISE
POTENTIAL AND THE INNER FRAUD
VII) INTERNALIZED MOTIVATION
DOING THE HARD THING
SELF-ESTEEM & PERFECTION
MESSAGES OF WORTH
A TRUFFLE a WEEK
ADDRESS:
433 Estudillo Ave., #305
San Leandro, CA 94577-4915
Ronald Mah, M.A., Ph.D.
Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, MFT32136
CONTACT INFORMATION:
phone: (510) 614-5641
fax: (510) 889-6553
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