Principles to Build Strong Child - RonaldMah

Ronald Mah, M.A., Ph.D.
Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist,
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Principles for Becoming Strong, or to Build a Strong Successful Child

One must experience stress, since stress is what builds strength.  Avoiding stress, avoids opportunities to grow.

One must experience frustration to learn how to survive it and deal with it successfully, since it accompanies life experiences, stresses, and challenges.  Avoiding frustration results in avoiding the stress that builds.

One must experience and become comfortable of failure, since failure is a natural consequence of trying anything or learning anything. Fear of failure results in one of two consequences: one will become socio-pathic and willing to win at all costs, no matter how harmful it is to oneself, others or the community; or, to guarantee no failure, one will not try.
While experiencing stress, frustration, and failure, one must also suffer in order to experience that one can suffer without being destroyed or overwhelmed; to discover ones resiliency.  If one feels that one cannot tolerate any suffering, then one will do extreme compulsive behaviors in order to avoid suffering.

A person can endure stress, frustration, failure, and suffering, if his/her caring authoritative individuals has the sensitivity to understand his/her abilities, limitations, and capacities.  

With that sensitivity, then such caring authoritative individuals can offer the appropriate support that one needs to benefit from stress, frustration, failure, and suffering.

From the experiences with sensitive support, one will develop strength, and

From the experiences with sensitive support, one will develop skills.

From the experiences, strength, and skills, one will develop a confidence that despite the difficulties and challenges of the world, they will survive.

Once one is confident that he/she can survive, then he/she can risk and have the opportunity to flourish in the world.

**All individuals must go through Stress, Frustration, Failure, & Suffering to grow powerful.  To build powerful successful children, parents must stress, frustrate, let their children fail, and make sure they suffer!  W/ sensitivity, they can support their children through this to develop strength & skills that will ensure survival and offer the possibility of flourishing.
433 Estudillo Ave., #305
San Leandro, CA 94577-4915
Ronald Mah, M.A., Ph.D.
Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, MFT32136
phone: (510) 614-5641
fax: (510) 889-6553
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